Annual Reviews

7 more hours, and we will be in 2010.

While the family sleeps, I am stealing some time to take stock of the year that is about to pass…

2009 is the year we welcome to our world our little princess Cara Krysania Lee. We wanted to name her Crysania Kara Lee, but nobody seemed to be able to pronounce her first name, and after she is borne, we felt that Cara suits her better. She’s a perfect little addition to our family. She’s demure and ladylike whilst Corum is loud and boisterous. She looks absolutely gorgeous in pink, and Mummy really enjoys dressing her up. Corum just turned 3 and is growing up well. He just said, “Mei-mei is the best sister ever! I love Mei-mei!” Daddy whispered to me, “But he only has one Mei-mei!” Oh well, it’s a good start…!

2009 is the year of travel. I have been travelling so frequently that sometimes I do not even bother to unpack. The worst travel stint was when I arrived back at Changi Airport at 12am, and I have to go back again at 6am. I have come to the conclusion that unless you are flying business class, business travel is so NOT glamorous!

2009 is the year my best friend Tsiao Yi got married to her university sweetheart Tow. And I was the matron of honour. The reason I flew across the globe to attend her wedding having only delivered a baby 6 weeks earlier and amidst the height of the H1N1 flu scare (other than she’s my best friend), is because I wanted to support them in their journey of love. Tow is battling cancer, and he’s in an advanced stage. Some people might think it’s crazy that they are even contemplating marriage but the love that they share is so pure, so sincere, so true that I wanted to be part of their beautiful wedding tapestry.

2009 is the year that Jamie and I got baptized. For myself personally, I seemed to have played a game of hide and seek with God in the last 20 years. And finally in 2009, I have found my way home.

2009 has been an extremely tiring year on the business front. I feel that I have been fire-fighting most of the time. And being an entrepreneur of 5 years, thinking I am no longer a ‘greenhorn’, I was not prepared for it. Especially since I was heavily pregnant with Cara… But I honestly believe that God will never throw you something that He thinks you cannot handle… We had to make some tough decisions. It was not easy but hurdle after hurdle, challenge after challenge, obstacle after obstacle, Jamie and I overcame them.

2009 is a year of reflection. I wondered if what I am doing is enough to help singles out there find love. Sometimes, it seems like such an uphill task…. A drop of water in the vast ocean.

As professionals and executives, we all have our criteria and preferences. We all believe ourselves to have attained a certain status in life and we have the right to demand and expect. It’s only normal.

So, it is so difficult to share with singles to look beyond the façade, to see beyond the superficial attributes, to ask yourself does that quality really matter when I am old and wrinkled… Hence, I am so heartened to know that one of my readers have actually stepped out of her comfort zone and she is now happily seeing someone whom she would in the past never consider.

That gave me a glimpse of hope that I am actually heading in the right direction. This year, I have started running my workshop for single ladies again, sharing with them on how to be, meet and choose the right one. Men, don’t worry… I am not trying to leave you out, but for now, my focus is on the fairer sex.

A big thank you to my team at Lunch Actually and Eteract. You ladies and guys have worked so very hard. Jamie and I really appreciate your effort, your loyalty and your dedication.

To my ‘Ba’ and ‘Mi’, I do not know what I will do without your selfless and tireless love.

To my parents in law, thank you so much for your time and your love for us and our two children.

To my dearest girlfriends and guyfriends, thank you for keeping me grounded and sane… as I will always be Yan when I am with you.

And to my dearest hubby, we have been through this very eventful year together. It wasn’t all rosy. But just like our wedding vows, “in good times and in bad times, when life seems easy and when life throws us challenges and difficult decisions…” WE MADE IT! And we have come out of it stronger! Thank you for being my anchor, my rock, my pillar of strength. I love you!

As the curtains fall, I bid 2009 a bittersweet farewell. It has not been easy, but there have been many beautiful rainbows that made up for the heavy storms. And… there are hopeful glimpses of what the future holds.

My dearest readers, Happy New Year!

Dearest Friends,

We have come to the end of the year 2008. In another 7 hours or so, we will be ushering in 2009.

It’s quite funny, I was looking back at my goals that I set for 2008, and I have to say that I have not been very successful in fully implementing most of them. There are some health goals, personal development goals and spiritual goals.

In terms of health goals, I wanted to take up yoga this year. Well, I did sign up for a class, which I did not manage to attend most of the time. Then I signed up for a yoga membership! (Yes, I never learn…) And then, I got pregnant, and decide to defer it till next year. So, I still have not advanced very far in that goal.

And in terms of the business goals, truth is… I am quite happy with our ‘report card’ this year…

1. Launch of Matchmaking Institute, South East Asia, and have run 3 courses so far.

2. Launch of ADAMS (Association of Dating Agencies and Matchmakers of Singapore).

3. Launch of LUNCH Actually, Hong Kong! This is like a dream that I have had ever since we started LUNCH Actually… to eventually go regional, and this is our first step!

4. Having lunch with Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong at the Istana! Wow… I wonder if I would ever get such a chance if I was not in the dating & matchmaking industry.

5. Jamie & I were one of the Honourees for Spirit of Enterprise Award 2008.

6. Both LUNCH Actually & Eteract.com were among the pioneer batch to be accredited by the Government’s SDU Trustmark. LUNCH Actually received CASETrust Accreditation.

7. Attended quite a number of clients’ weddings, sharing in their bliss and happiness. And knowing that there are LUNCH Actually babies out there, and more on the way…!

And yet, it just never feels good enough.

I was quite down for a while yesterday, when I spoke to a single lady in her late 30s. I know that based on her profile and preferences, I am not able to sign her up as a member, because many guys in our database are looking for younger ladies. I explained the situation to her, but she got quite upset with me. And after I put down the phone, I was quite sad. I am upset because after 5 years in the industry, I am still not able to help these older ladies. I wonder if we ever can…

In terms of personal development goals, I wanted to complete my Advanced Communicator Silver for Toastmasters, but unfortunately I did not get very far. I did take part in the Humorous Speech Contest this year, and got as far as the Division Level. And… I forgot my speech half way. Stood there for 30 seconds. And then recovered. Can you believe it? I did not forget my speech at Club or Area Level, but it had to happen at the Division Level! Nonetheless, it was a good learning experience, and I learnt a lot from the more accomplished speakers.

The one goal that I have set, and I felt that I have accomplished is my spiritual goal. Last year, at about this time, Jamie and I decided to start attending church again. And our goal was to attend church regularly. Apart from some missing weeks here and there, we are on track. I must say Jamie and I have benefited so much from God’s Grace this year. Many times, we are tasked with facing difficult decisions or challenges, and God has answered all our prayers.

Many have predicted 2009 to be a challenging year in terms of the economic outlook.

I am preparing myself for an interesting year ahead. I am optimistic and I believe that there would be even more opportunities out there for us to reach out to more singles and help them find their happiness. 2009 is also the year that Jamie and I will be welcoming a new addition to our family. Did I tell you my Babe kisses my tummy now when I ask him to ‘sayang’ (love) his Mei-mei? Oh ya, we are expecting a girl!

As this year comes to a close, I would like to take the opportunity to say a big thank you the kind souls who have made a big difference in my life this year.

My ever-doting parents who give unconditionally. My in-laws & my extended family for their support, especially with Babe when Jamie and I are at work. Yin Yin & Vincent for being so wonderful and supportive, and walking with my parents’ in their journey with Christ. My girlfriends, you know who you are, for lending a listening ear, for believing in my dreams, and simply letting me be me. My team at LUNCH Actually & Eteract for working so hard throughout the year.

And… as always, I save the best for last… :) My dearest husband, without you, I will not be able to accomplish half of what I have done this year. You are truly my inspiration, my unwavering supporter, my pillar of strength. Thank you for putting up with my ups and downs, my crazy mood swings, my PMSes. I know you already know this, but I can never say it often enough… I love you!

To all my dearest friends and readers out there, Happy New Year! May the new year brings you much joy, laughter and happiness!

Love, Violet

P/S A new poll is up, go vote!

Dear friends,

How are you? Hope you have had a wonderful Christmas Celebration!

The reason you have not heard from me for so long is because… I am suffering from writer’s block! Yes, you heard me right! And this is the worst time to be hit with this, as I have recently be featured as one of the bloggers on “Notes from Venus“! (Much thanks to Anna & Gerry who believe in my work! You ladies are great!)… Btw, if you got to my blog from Notes from Venus, a very warm welcome to you!

Anyway, I have been extremely busy for the past couple of weeks… I can hear some of my close friends saying, “Yes Violet… what’s new?” Haha!

Just some updates… Christmas was fantastic. My parents were in town and it was good to catch up with them + they spending quality time with babe. Got some great presents, favourite one is from dearest hubby who gave me a mobile phone…! It’s a Nokia Navigator, which means I will never get lost again! Haha! Had the Lunch Actually team, alumni + spouses over at our place for our annual Christmas party. Had a blast playing games… And yes, the girls won AGAIN! Woohoo!

As 2007 draws to a close, it is time to look back at the outgoing year, make New Year resolutions for the incoming year.

2007 has been a year of ups and downs, hits and misses. But looking back, the highlight of my year in terms of my profession is not the media coverage that we are so blessed to have. It is not being the first South East Asian to be a panelist at the first Worldwide Matchmaking Conference. And even though I love Eteract to bits, it is not the official launch of Eteract in October. For me, the greatest sense of accomplishment is to attend the wedding of one of our couples in KL and to see the joy on their face, and to witness the beginning of their journey as husband and wife.

My profession as a modern-day matchmaker is sometimes a thankless one as many couples prefer to keep their relationships and marriages under-wraps. Maybe they are worried that we might publicise it without their consent. Hence, the experience of being thanked over and over again by this couple (until I myself feel paiseh/embarrassed) reinforced my commitment to my profession and my desire to bring people together.

2007 is also a very special year for Jamie and I as we watch our babe grow from an infant to a toddler. I believe that parenthood is one of the most amazing journeys that one can take. To witness the first smile, the first crawl, the first tooth sprouting, the first stand, the first step, the first word… so many firsts… And to see the proud and victorious smile on his face when he knows that he has achieved another milestone. And to observe the determination and perseverance to keep going despite falling down.

Our babe actually taught us a lot this year. He reminded us that if you put your heart and soul to it, and if you refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer, and if you just keep trying, you are actually making incremental steps. It might be slow sometimes, but one thing for sure… you WILL get there.

2007 is a year about gratitude. I feel extremely blessed by all that have been given to me this year. I have received so much love and support from my family, my team, my friends, my business associates and my blog readers. And I am truly thankful for your endless encouragement. And most of all, I would not be who I am without the love, support and inspiration from my dearest hubby. Hubby, xie xie ni!

As the clock ticks away, and as I await the monumental fireworks on the 31st Dec 2007 in front of my TV screen, I will be looking forward to yet another year of great learnings, joyous experiences and wonderful friendships.

Dear friends, here’s to a fabulous and exciting 2008!

Love, Violet

2nd day of 2006. Happy New Year!

Have meant to write my 2005 Annual Report before the year ended. But as it usually goes, one thing led to another, and before I know it… 2005 has come and gone.

I was just telling Jamie the other day that I feel that I have not accomplished much in the year of 2005. Maybe that is why I have put off writing my annual report. I felt 2004 was a fantastic year in terms of personal breakthrough. I left my job to pursue my dreams. I started a business with my then fiance, now husband. And as a team, we created Lunch Actually. Wow, that was one exhilarating year!

The always wise significant other said… “Why don’t you look through your calendar and see what you have done in the past year? It is not as bad as you think.”

2005 was about stabilisation. As they say, starting a business is easy. It is the maintenance that is difficult. Do you know 50% of first businesses fail in the 1st five years? 80% will fail in the first 5 years? 98% will fail in the first 10 years? Ok, those were the approximate figures that I remember, so do not quote me. But anyway, you get my point. We have just survived our 1.5 years. In April, we will be celebrating our 2nd year Anniversary. 3 more years to the 5 years mark and 8 more years to the 10 years mark.

2005 was about expansion. After starting our business in Singapore, it has always been my dream to bring the concept back to my hometown Kuala Lumpur. But, we never found the right time, right opportunity or the right partner. And finally after 1.5 years, we launched our KL office in September. Girlfriends thought I have totally lost it, as we launched the branch 2 weeks before the wedding! I guess, it was a personal challenge for Jamie and I. To start a new chapter in our professional life as well as personal life.

2005 was about love. Jamie and I finally tied the knot after 5 years of courtship. It was a fun-filled event. It was perfect. If I were to be given a chance to make any changes to it, I wouldn’t. Because even though we did not have much time to prepare for it , it just turned out absolutely how I would have wanted it to be. And many friends have come to me after the wedding, “That was one of the best, if not the best weddings that I have ever attended!” Aww…so sweet of them.

I was doing an interview for a Malaysian chinese magazine the other day – and the journalist asked me, “What do you think is an ideal husband?” I think I did not do the question justice the other day. To me, an ideal husband is of course Jamie. He knows when to let me have my way, yet he knows when to stand up to my ridiculous tantrums. He knows when I just need that little TLC (tender loving care), and he knows when to leave me alone to my own device. He knows how to cook, he’s willing to help out in house chores, yet at the same time gives me opportunities to show off my feminine side. I enjoy being a ‘xiao nu ren’ (mandarin, little woman i.e. the traditional wife) too ok? He looks after me, my family, and our finances. He’s the thinker, he’s the strategist, and when you are with him, you feel safe, secure and well looked after.

2005 was about friendship. You never know how much your friends and family love you until there comes a time for them to prove their love. Our wedding would definitely not be as fantastic as it has been not for their time, effort and encouragement. They helped with the planning, the coordination, contributed ideas to make it perfect. My girlfriends gave me a fabulous hens’ night. Haha, definitely memorable and unforgettable. And the 3 days celebration was just great. Everything was well taken care for. I was a happy and relaxed bride. Girlfriends came back from all around the world (U.S., Canada, UK, Beijing) to be with me on the most special day of my life. It was just great! Both sides’ parents made things easy as well. No difficult demands on either sides, just lots of help, support and love.

2005 was about loss. Jamie lost his grandfather. I lost a ‘en ren’ (mandarin, person who gave you great help). Both were great men in their own right. One a family man, who loved his family so much, and strived hard to protect and look after them. One a charismatic business leader. I have read about Sam Walton’s leadership, Ray Kroc’s ingenuity but I have never come face-to-face with such greatness. Hence, I am honoured to have met Sunil Sreenivasan personally.

2005 was amazing. I learnt a lot. I made and kept many great friends. I made mistakes along the way. I discovered myself in the process.

Let’s toast to another enriching and meaningful year ahead!

Happy New Year!