DaFG: To be punctual or late on a first date?

A while ago, I was contacted by Munkysuperstar's Clicknetwork about one of their shows… Xiaxue's Guide to Life! I was like… wow! 🙂 I have been following Xiaxue's blog on and off for a while now. I am impressed by how she has built her blog and her brand. When I hear people saying, "Xiaxue is such a bimbo!" I will tell them, no bimbo will be able to garner such a big following. Do you know her daily readership is bigger than some monthly magazines? She might sometimes portray herself in a frivolous manner, but she's definitely a smart girl.

So anyway, they wanted to know if I wanted to teach Xiaxue (a.k.a. Wendy Cheng) to match-make. And I was of course I said yes!

I had a lot of fun at the shoot. Xiaxue and Gillian (owner and director @Munkysuperstar) were really nice and easy to work with. You can find some photos taken on site the shoot here.

They even found Xiaxue a 'client' to practise her skills on. The guy Terence is really sporting I thought. 

One of the advice that Xiaxue gave to Terence was that he should not arrive on time for a date. He should actually arrive late, because if he arrives early, the girl would think that he's too keen. And Terence was quite shocked with her advice. 🙂

This is a question that I get from many guys actually. Even from one of my previous posts, one reader asked,

hmm…. I've done the 3 items that Edwards has done but I'm still dateless…. on the other hand, I've seen man who do the exact opposite being more successful with ladies. So not really sure what works and what doesn't work.

The answer is… it really depends on the type of girls you are going for. And the type of guy you are.

For men who are going for women who receive more attention that she can handle, then of course, if you go with the plain vanilla approach all the time, it's going to fall flat. Just imagine this, you are a beautiful woman, and everywhere you go, heads will turn. You probably have people try to get your number and pick you up 5-10 times a day. Or even more! And when you do go on a date, most of the guys play the perfect gentleman and arrive punctually, presents in toll, waiting for your arrival. You have already come to expect it. It's boring.

So for a guy to grab her attention, what can he do? He has to do the exact opposite of what all the other men have been doing! By arriving late, he would have riled her up because in her mind she's thinking, "Who do you think you are? How dare you!" At the same time, there will be a tiny thought in her head, "This guy is different from the others. He dares to be late when coming on a date with me, could it be his 'market value' is actually higher than mine?"

However, for Terence, I believe that he's looking for someone who's down-to-earth and girl-next-door. Someone who probably would appreciate his punctuality and his chivalrous acts. By turning up late, he might actually put her off. Yes, she would also think, "Who do you think you are?" but more importantly, she would think, "He is not worth my time as he does not even bother to respect my time!"

So, to be punctual or late?

There's no right or wrong answer.

However, I do advice all my clients (male & female) to be punctual on their first dates, For me personally, I feel that it is only right that you respect other people's time. And if a guy is not going to be interested in me because I am punctual (because maybe being punctual, to him, it's a sign of desperation), then he is probably not the right fit for me!

Happy dating! 🙂

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For those of you who have not had the chance the watch the video, here it is! 🙂

GTL EP75 Matchmaking from clicknetwork on Vimeo.

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