Perfect Guy? Perfect Girl?
She said, “I never really had any golden rules when it comes to my future partner. I wasn’t looking for a perfect guy.”
“My husband is not a perfect guy. Neither am I a perfect girl. But we just happened to be a perfect match for each other.”
“What I love about my husband is that… I never felt that I needed to be more than I am. I could just be myself, and not pretend to be someone I am not. When he met me, he accepted me as me.”
These are some excerpts from my dear friend Wai Kea‘s wedding speech.
Sometimes, I wonder… if I am doing my clients a disfavour by asking them for a list of their criteria. How old mustÂ she be? How tall mustÂ he be? MustÂ she be of the same religion? Must he share your interests and hobbies? And as I ask more questions, I am helping them create a funnel.
Yet at the same time, I know that if they were to meet someone on their own who is not out of their age range just by 3 or 4 years, but they have ‘chemistry’, age would not even be an issue. For example, I don’t think my mum set out to findÂ a man who is 2 years her junior. She probably was like me… looking to date someone who is of the same age or older. But she met my dad. And the rest as they say is history…
Something just tugged at my heartstring when she said… “He is not a perfect guy. But I am not a perfect girl either.” Truth is, many a times, most of us are not the most eligible person… maybe we have not been blessed by the best looks, or we really need to go to the gym to lose a few pounds. Or we really could do with a few inches in height. But, at the end of the day, to be in a blissful relationship, and to tie the knot… these things that create that initial sparks or ‘electricity’ do not really matter…
“What impressed me about her… after meeting up with her again all these years at a friend’s wedding is her thoughtfulness.Â I never had a girl serve me food during a dinner. It’s usually guys who do the serving,” he said. “She was surprised when I told her this later.”
Acts of specific kindness. I talked about this during my workshop. And I was happy to witness yet another episode of it in real life. By just being herself. An open book.
Some girls might wonder, “Would he think that I am desperate? Or too forward? Or weird? Or making the first move?”Â
She beingÂ a direct, no-games, no-nonsense girl, she won his heart through a gesture that she probably did not even put much thought to.
Maybe sometimes, if we just continuously improve ourselves. Be comfortable in our own skin. We would eventually meet someone who truly appreciates us for who we are. Maybe he would not meet our initial criteria of Prince Charming. But face it, maybe we are not Princess Belle either.
Like what my dear friend has put it so aptly. “He is not a perfect guy. But I am not the perfect girl either. We are just a perfect match for each other.”Share on Facebook