Through Thick and Thin
Have been traveling between Singapore and KL so often… it’s pretty crazy! Traveling reminds me of my long distance relationship with Jamie. We spent 2.5 years apart.
If you ask me if I would do it again? E.g. if I were to work in KL permanently, and Jamie in Singapore, I don’t think I will. I do not mind being separated by circumstances (when I was studying), but given the choice, I would rather be where he is, even if it means some small sacrifices on my side. I guess the reason is… we are the “sticky type”?
A friend and her husband will be apart for 3 years. Her husband has been posted overseas. She has decided to pursue her career back home as she’s not sure if there are career opportunities for her where her husband has been posted to. Her husband respects her decision.
I respect her decision too. A woman should be independent and able to lead her own life. It is not all about one’s husband, and adjusting to his life and his needs. Perhaps, the Chinese saying “Once you are married, you must follow your husband,” is somewhat dated in this modern fast-paced world.
Long distance relationships… this reminds me of a disturbing story that I heard 6-7 years ago. I used to visit this old lady V during my boarding school days in England as part of my community service project. Though, I always felt that she was the one doing the charity as she always prepared these wonderful cakes and cookies for me.
Anyway, back to her story… her son was posted to work in Asia. And his wife refused to go with him. They have two school-going children. It is a predictable story. So… the son stayed in Thailand for a couple of years. He hooked up with his housekeeper and they have a son together.
And eventually he asked for a divorce but his wife refused to divorce him. They worked out an agreement where he will continue to support his wife and his daughters but it was understood that the marriage is very much over.
At first V was on the side of her daughter-in-law, saying that her son was at fault. And she wondered what her son saw in the Thai lady as she’s no beauty. And she was a divorcee as well. But as times went by, V felt that her daughter-in-law made the wrong choice by not going to Asia with her son. Because she said… a man all alone out there, he would feel lonely…
I could see V’s point of view. But somehow I am just not convinced. It does not matter whether he was lonely or not. He, in his wedding vows, has promised that he would stick with his wife through thick and thin…
I do feel sorry for her daughter-in-law.
For she will always think “What if I have gone to Asia with him? Would I be able to save my marriage?”
What are your opinions on this issue? Do you think the wife should have gone with him when he pleaded with her to? Have you been in a long distance relationship and have some tips to share? Or, you would just like to drop me a comment? Looking forward to hear from you!Share on Facebook